Defunkify Thyself

I've been in a funk lately.

I'm not sure why or what it is about. Call it post-break blues or pollen brain. Whatever the name, for some reason I have been struggling with my attitude and spark for life. I can't even blame it on anything good like Seasonal Affective Disorder or the winter blues. I just feel funky.

So in an effort to defunkify, I have decided to make a list of good ideas to improve my cause. In other words, I'm trying to write myself out of my funk. We'll see if it works. Maybe you have some suggestions too -- please pass them along. Hopefully this too shall pass.

My Best Ideas to Get Out of a Funk

Move.

Walk, run, bike, anything. Even if it's a walk around the yard, movement is key.

Get the junk out.

Clearing away the outside clutter is a nice way of also clearing away inside clutter. Set a goal to get rid of three things a day for a week.

Change.

Literally. Try doing everything different for awhile. Take a new route home, say yes if you always say no, find a new hangout, wear different clothes.

Eat Really Well.

Your mom called, she said to eat your vegetables.

Treat Yourself.

What would be a small thing that would make you smile? For me, it's firecracker pops. You know, those red, white and blue popsicles that everyone eats for the Fourth of July? I just ate one yesterday with the neighborhood kids on the back porch on a sunny day. I felt like I was 12 ready to take a spin on my 10-speed bike.

Hang out with people that love you.

These are the kind of friends that you can say "tell me three things that you like about me right now." Everyone should have at least one person who can give you real encouragement. If you don't have that, imagine your Creator whispering in your ear and reminding you of your gifts and talents.

Laugh.

Go ahead, rent your favorite movies that make you laugh. I love watching When Harry Met Sally or Pretty Woman or even The Sound of Music. Renew your happiness quotient with your favorite funnies.

Be a Slug.

A "do-nothing" day can do wonders for the soul. A day where you get to stay in your jammies, eat pizza or whatever you love. Read the entire paper, get lost in a book, meditate, pray or lay around. The day is your gift. Give yourself permission to do whatever you want, even if it is absolutely nothing.

Do Something You Really Love.

What makes your heart sing? Do that thing. Maybe it's gardening, golf, painting, going to exotic restaurants, having a lovely cup of coffee while staring at art. Whatever your fancy, commit to finding time for that one thing you love every day. Even if it's just scheduling it, thinking about it, reading or learning more about it. Keep your passions alive, they are what define your soul.

Operation Beautiful

On a recent Sunday morning visit to the gym, someone left me a secret message.

I have to say it put a smile on my face and a curiosity in my mind. It left me wondering how many lives could be changed with the power of a little encouragement.

I opened my gym locker to find a note saying "don't ever let anyone tell you that you aren't beautiful. Pass on the message that you are beautiful and keep it going." from www.operationbeautiful.com.

I grinned like a high schooler. I immediately put it in the locker of the girl next to me and witnessed her shine too. It was funny to me how a small anonymous note made my day, perhaps my week.

But isn't that what every girl wants? To feel beautiful and for others to notice it too? I couldn't think of a more perfect place for Operation Beautiful to be in full affect then at the gym. Sometimes women can be our own worst enemies, especially in our heads.

I spent some time checking out the Operation Beautiful website and enjoyed reading all the fun ways other women had come up with passing on the beauty effect. I immediately made a mental note to pick up some fun post-it notes to become an ambassador for the cause.

The world could use more beauty in it, especially beginning in our own hearts.

To learn more, visit www.operationbeautiful.com.

Casserole Season

It’s been casserole season lately.

Winter’s final exhale has brought a mixture of bittersweet to my circle of friends. There’s been a layoff, a cancer diagnosis, a divorce, a heart scare and a new baby. Along with these changes, comes the ever-present casserole. It is simply the right thing to do. There is something wonderful about a square of comfort delivered by loving hands.

The casserole once was an important reassurance for me. When I was in middle school, my dad was in a life-threatening car accident. My days were filled with school, followed by the long drive to the hospital and back home again. Exhausted, worried and scared, I remember coming home and seeing the casseroles spread out on our kitchen table. Their well wishes brought kind relief and warmth that is hard to explain.

Miraculously, beautifully -- the casseroles kept showing up on our kitchen table. Sweet encouragement from friends, neighbors, church ladies, people I didn’t even know. I have never been more grateful for such kindness.

When you are beat up by life, a casserole might be the best thing you can imagine. It is a glimmer of hope when none can be found. More than food, casseroles say “hang in there, you’re gonna be okay, kid.” It is a high honor to give someone that kind of hope, even if it’s only a casserole.

13 Reason Why Women Should Take Up Boxing

I'm a lover not a fighter.

But watching my friend Lisa box makes me wonder if she is onto something by taking up the sport this year. Watching her go from already pretty fit to now superwoman level has been stunning to watch.

Let me be clear -- I'm not talking about taking a class on boxing (although that could be good too). I am talking about getting into a real ring and fighting Rocky style with the headgear and bells, the whole bit. The little bit of boxing I have done with a trainer has definitely given me a sense of pure grit that is simply not available on a treadmill. The unnatural but thrilling moment comes as I wrap my hands up in protective gear and then slide on those big bad gloves. Next with every hook, jab, cross -- all I can think of is pure power.

My friend Lisa now carries a certain air with her walk. I have quietly noticed life doesn't intimidate her as much, she knows what to do under pressure, she handles things with agility -- just like she is in a virtual boxing ring. Dare I say this -- she is one bad mamma jamma.

But don't take it from me -- you can hear it from her direct. She is giving a talk about "13 Reasons Why Women Should Take Up Boxing" on Wednesday, March 3 at Ignite Raleigh at the Lincoln Theatre in Raleigh, NC at 7 p.m. (for more info, visit www.igniteraleigh.com)

I may not be a boxer, but I'm fascinated by the life lesson that my friend Lisa gives. The idea that when you are willing to do something totally out of your comfort zone, it changes everything. Even for the people who watch.

Birthday Love

I'm feeling very loved.

After a small avalanche of birthday wishes on Facebook, topped off by a cozy family evening of fondue and red velvet cupcakes, my love tank is full. It doesn't take much to make me happy these days.

After all the sadnesses of Haiti, a friend's husband struggling with brain cancer and another gal pal who is beginning radiation and chemotherapy, I know I have a lot to be thankful for. I have my health, a great husband, a lovely son and a stunning collection of friends who are good with computers.

The beauty of social media is it's snappy ability to remind everyone that it's your birthday. As always we still get to enjoy birthday cards, birthday lunches and of course, presents from our close family and friends.

This year brought birthday wishes on steroids -- as I got celebratory wishes from my chiropractor, grocery stores, retail stores, the vet and yes even my dentist. Some may think that this is really cheesy, as they don't really care about your birthday, they just want your business.

True, but I'm still going to bask in my birthday love wishes, even if they are from my mechanic.

What to Do with a Bad Book?

After treasuring the book Julie & Julia by Julie Powell, I was looking forward to picking up her next book, Cleaving.

The Julia book was a blast for me -- My mom practically had a personal gourmet shrine to Julia Child growing up. It was a treat to read along as Julie plowed through Julia Child's Mastering the Art of French Cooking series. The "Cleaving" book was supposed to be what happened next to Julie Powell...I couldn't wait to see.

In one word: disaster. Quick summary: naughty cheating on husband story, going to work at a butcher shoppe in detail and all the horrible self-destruction style behavior to go along with it. Lovely. Just the sort of pick-me-up you need for 2010.

Not only had I bought the book, but also had taken the extra step of downloading it to my electronic reader. Truly, I felt invested. I had paid good money, now what to do with a horrible, drag you down electronic book? I felt sort of like watching the Tiger Woods debacle -- horribly disgusted, but for some reason unable to look away.

What to do with a bad book?

1. Stop reading -- Trash the book.

2. Plow through and hope it gets better.

Maybe I had high expectations, maybe I'm not cut out for the dirty little secret experience. I have learned this about my reading style -- life is pretty rough, so know what you are getting into before you go and spend good money on a book. Especially an electronic book that you can't even re-gift or take to charity or get your money back.

Perhaps I'm in the wrong state of mind for this sort of book right now. Maybe I will save it for another day and see if it strikes me differently. Perhaps never would be about the right time.

The Christmas Collage

Every Christmas season starts with the ratty little collage.

I made it more than ten years ago. I was newly married, but still lacking the confidence of how things were supposed to go. My collage was really just an oversized piece of poster board. It featured a quote I read in a book that spoke so loudly in my head, I couldn't stop thinking about it. Just like everything else in those newlywed years, I was trying to do the best I could and hoping things would turn out alright.

Christmas was always a slippery slope for me. For some reason, I couldn't shake the guilty childhood feelings of either feeling like I had too much or I didn't have enough. There never was a true joy about it. After I read this quote about Christmas, it changed for me. I wanted to wear this statement about Christmas, to walk around in it, to let it be who I was. Instead I did the next best thing, I made a collage out of it. With beautiful re-used Christmas cards framing my faded handwriting, every year this becomes the decoration I love best.

Here's what it says:

"If, as Herod, we fill our lives with things, and again with things; if we consider ourselves so unimportant that we must fill every moment of our lives with action, when will we have the time to make the long, slow journey across the desert as did the Magi? Or sit and watch the stars as did the shepherds? Or brood over the coming of the child as did Mary? For each on of us, there is a desert to travel. A star to discover. And a being within ourselves to bring to life." -- Author Unknown

(an excerpt from Simple Abundance: A Daybook of Comfort and Joy by Sarah Ban Breathnach)

For me, my collage and this powerful quote remind me of the point of Christmas. The trouble is -- I don't want to miss it. I want to attend all the great plays, hear all the awesome concerts, see all the lights, the parades and the parties. But in my heart, all I want is this quote. Year by year, my collage strikes me differently. Over time, I find myself seeing from a different vantage point -- whether it's from the shepherd's watch, the mom looking down on her child, crossing my own desert, looking for the stars. It always speaks to me and always reminds me.

The truth is I don't have to do anything, buy anything or be anything to have a beautiful Christmas. I only have to stop and notice all the beauty before me. And in that pause, to truly see the one star overhead.